Thursday, September 29, 2011

Home Tour: Taking Back Space After Separation

Since Ryan left, I've felt a tremendous urge to make our room more MY room! Of course, I have had very little money to do this, but I've made a few small changes. These few changes have given me some control over a space that could otherwise bring me down....way....way....down.

The first change I made didn't cost a cent. I filled the giant gap his clothes left in the closet {and filled up his empty bedside table drawers}. Don't be fooled. I couldn't bring myself to do this for weeks. Something about it just felt so final.

Eventually, I decided that I hated the reminder I got every time I opened the closet. I decided that it was making me feel worse and stuck and...depressed. THAT'S the day I did something about it! Of course, he had way more clothes than I did, so I just took the hangers and spread them out. Then, I divided my sweaters and sweatshirts into two groups and filled his former sweatshirt shelf with my sweaters. Lastly, the few shoes I had on the floor went into his shoe shelf, and I was finished. My stuff was spread out. I could breathe, and all that extra space reminded me that one day I'll have a full time job again. Then, I'll be able to finally afford to go shopping and fill it up {with some hot date clothes maybe...}. Hey, a girl's gotta dream!

The next change was easy too. I just took this pillow...

and turned it around...

I thought the little brown pillow added texture and a touch of femininity, so I threw it on there too. I'm still deciding if I like it or not. {$7 Walmart clearance find}

The next change was a bit out of necessity, for me anyway. Our old blue curtains were thin and see-through, and I didn't feel safe, since my bedroom faces the street...

Call me a baby, but I'm a scatty cat, and sleep is important to me! I replaced them with lined, chocolate brown curtains I found on a Target end cap for $12! I hung them up, but it didn't give the exact impact I wanted, and since they were a clearance item, I knew I better scoop them up. The next day, I went back and got another set!

Much better! I think it adds drama, a touch of romance, and they coordinate well with the little brown Walmart pillow. I also scored those two prints for $15 at T.J. Maxx. Don't you just love to turn a T.J. item over and see those little red clearance stickers?!

There's still some changes I'd like to make...

Even though I'm keeping my last name, that "A" just represents our marriage bed. Since it's most definitely not that anymore, leaving it there would be like a constant reminder of who used to share it with me. It just has to go...eventually...when I can afford a cool mirror big enough to cover it!

I also still have one of our wedding pictures framed on a bedside table...

I've taken up sleeping on his former side, so I don't wake up looking at it anymore, but I'll replace it as soon as I get around to printing one of Preston I like. Baby steps, people. Baby steps! {Notice that I still use Preston's baby monitor too, but I don't like it in plain view, so it gets hidden behind the display.} The frames and candle were originally from T.J. Maxx. The book was from a garage sale.

If you're going through a divorce, or have gone through one, what was one of the first things you did to take back your space?!

EDIT 10/3/11:

Since originally writing this post, I have replaced the wedding picture next to my bed!

I got lucky enough to stumble upon this GREETING CARD on clearance at Pier 1 Imports. It was just $1.98, and I simply cut it to fit! I am thrilled with the symbolic results, and it makes me smile every time I look at it!


  1. I have to say I like the brown curtains better! : )

  2. I have to say I like the brown curtains better! Your room is beautiful! ~Lacey

  3. Good for you taking the baby steps you've taken. I know it seems hard, but you seem to be handling it all with such grace. My only suggestion? Print out a new picture for that frame beside the bed! ;-) (Sorry to be posting as "Anonymous" but for some reason I haven't been able to do it any other way today...) Ellen from

  4. Thanks so much, Lacey and Ellen! Your comments bring a smile to my face!

  5. Hi Crystal,
    I just stumbled on your blog after seeing your pumpkins on Cottage Living - I voted for yours! I'm going through your online house "tour," and I'm amazed at your talent and creativity. What a LOVE filled home you have created for yourself and your precious little boy! Any man who wouldn't want to share your beautiful life with you and your sweet, sweet baby is an absolute moron. I don't know your situation, but looking in from the outside, the problem is with him. A man who could desert his wife and child is no man. He's missing out on so much joy. You deserve someone who appreciates all you have to offer. Keep loving yourself and your son, and I know everything will turn out fine!